"The first is to change the world – or at least the parts of the world you expose yourself to. You can do this by, say, turning off the television, not seeking out the goriest movies, staying away from the divisive forces in your life.
The second is to change your mind – that is, change your mental activity, either through attention or thinking. You can be exposed to something nasty, but you can shift your attention in a very rapid way so that you think of other things that are more positive or neutral. Say you’re stuck in a meeting with people who are very toxic. You can develop the capacity to shift or modify your emotional focus, and that can be immensely powerful.
The third is to change your body and how your body is responding. Gross suggests trying deep breathing or relaxation techniques to keep your body calm.
“We find in our work that people can use each of these strategies and it really changes the emotion and stress response – both the physiological and brain response and the brain areas associated with emotion generation.”
Goleman echoes this recommendation: “We are masters of our inner world. We can intentionally practice methods for relaxation that will counter the stress of negativity. The more we practice, the better it works as an inoculation against toxic environments. Find a relaxation method that works for you and practice it daily – the same way you would an exercise routine.” [MY NOTE: like jogging; or blogging; or "hobbying"]
And then there’s the flip side of contagious stress: contagious joy, happiness, bliss. Emotional contagion applies to positive emotions as well.
“Happily so,” observes Goleman. “When we’re with an upbeat person, we’re likely to catch their mood too.”
It reminds me of something Oprah once said she learned from Jill Bolte Taylor, the brain scientist who wrote “My Stroke of Insight”: “You are responsible for the energy that you create for yourself, and you’re responsible for the energy that you bring to others.” "
I show you my MAXICARD from CANADA with The COUGAR (Puma concolor), showing this feline relaxing on a mountain, away from it all. |
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